Every Day's a New Beginning

Two semesters down, one to go! I've turned in all of my final portfolios: a 30 minute screenplay about a town that worships Bigfoot, a blog post promoting myself as a writer, a proposal for an app that would connect writers to each other, a short story about a young girl and her pet fairy, and more. All done.

Which leaves me with about a month before my third and final semester begins.

Here's what I'm not good at: time management. I start most days with a list of things I need to do, and almost without fail, I wind up falling asleep on the couch for several hours in the middle of the day. Or deciding I need to learn how to play the ukulele right now. Or making friends with the spider who lived on my kitchen ceiling (RIP Leroy). Or doing pretty much anything that isn't on my To Do list.

Every day, my social media is flooded with posts from people who are trying their best to take advantage of the free time they have because of quarantine. They're doing more workouts! Developing new skills! Learning a language! Writing a book! Starting a business! And they encourage others to do the same!

And that's great! To the people who thrive by staying busy and pushing themselves, I say, "Way to go!" But not all of us are like that.

For one of my classes this semester, I had to read the book Pedagogy of the Oppressed by Paulo Friere. It is a third-eye-wide-open kind of book - and one of the main points is that the modern education system isn't designed to make us creative, critical thinkers. It's designed to make us efficient and obedient workers. We're taught from a young age that we have to be good at what we do in order for it to be worth our time. Whatever output we create should and will be judged, and it's our job to put in more time and effort to make it exactly the way the judge wants.

So let me be the one to remind you - you don't have to capitalize on your time in quarantine. There won't be a test at the end; living your life during a world-wide pandemic isn't something you can 'fail'.

Look closely at the horizon! You can see the ocean!

(Pride & Prejudice reference incoming)

Maybe Lady Catherine De Bourgh will be disappointed that you haven't become accomplished at the piano, learned to speak several languages, and caught the attention of a man who makes ten thousand a year, but who cares?

It's enough to just get out of bed every morning. In the book of Lamentations, it is written: "God's compassions are new every morning." And if God has compassion for you every day, then you can have compassion for yourself. Start each day fresh. Drink lots of water. Eat at regular intervals. Let sunlight touch your face.

We don't have to come out of this as 'better' or 'superior' (or smarter or richer or thinner) people. It'll be enough to come out of it at all - and we will.

Recently I posted on Instagram that I am trying to live in quarantine like I live on Sabbath days: doing things that are life-giving, and avoiding things that aren't. Is writing life-giving? Most of the time! Is cleaning life-giving? It doesn't feel like it, but living in a clean space is. Is going for a daily walk outside life-giving? Absolutely.

Along with preparing for my major project next semester and consistently washing my dishes, I've decided to take this free time to explore Edinburgh more. I grew up in the suburbs of Pittsburgh, and until last year I couldn't find my way around the city if my life depended on it. To quote the TV show Psych, I have the bearings of a wounded bumblebee. It wasn't until I graduated and got a job with family services that this changed. Part of my job last year was driving to people's houses to do home visits and assessments, and we covered all of Allegheny county - in other words, I saw a lot of the city every day. And because I was constantly driving from the suburbs to the strip district to Squirrel Hill, I started putting together a pretty good mental map. Suddenly, I always knew where I was! And I knew how to get places without consulting my phone!

This is the relationship I want with Edinburgh. I want to know where the little back neighborhoods are, where kids write notes to each other in sidewalk chalk. I want to know just how far west the canal goes. See that big hill in the distance? I'm going to find out how to get there.

And it has been perfect walking weather here. Blue skies, sunshine that lasts into the early hours of the evening, a distinct lack of Scotland rain - I've almost forgotten where I'm living. There are flowers blooming everywhere, an old couple cloud watching on the closed golf course, a runner who smiles at me every time we pass each other on the hiking trail.

It may feel like life has been put on pause, but the world is still turning.

The trees have leaves on them again. The days are longer.

We're going to make it.

We're going to make it.

Book Recommendation: Scouting the Divine by Margaret Feinberg. This is a bright and refreshing book about a woman who wanted to learn more about metaphors in the Bible. To learn what it means for God to be a shepherd, she consults a real-life shepherd. To learn what it means for a land to be flowing with milk and honey, she talks to a beekeeper. God is the vine and we are the branches? She asks a vintner what that looks like. It's a great read, and it brings a whole new meaning to the Word.